Perspective

A friend sent me this lovely story this week and although it's a little cliche, God used it to re-illustrated something he'd been showing me:

A young couple moved into a new neighborhood. The next morning while they were eating breakfast, the young woman saw her neighbor hanging the wash outside.

'That laundry is not very clean,' she said. 'She doesn't know how to wash correctly. Perhaps she needs better laundry soap.'

Her husband looked on, but remained silent.Every time her neighbor would hang her wash to dry, the young woman would make the same comments.

About one month later, the woman was surprised to see a nice clean wash on the line and said to her husband: 'Look, she has learned how to wash correctly. I wonder who taught her this.'

Her husband said, 'I got up early this morning and cleaned our windows.'

And so it is with life.

It's so true.

 "What we see when watching others depends on the window through which we look."

God has been reminding me that so much of the way I speak or act is framed by my own experience, my own way of filtering the world. Friends, the way you and I think, the way we feel, the way in which we hear things or interpret things is based on so many things, that the only real answer is to give one another grace...

It's true of marriage too. The way your spouse hears what you say may have nothing to do with what you actually said - but if his filter is one of condemnation, then that is what he will hear. If hers is one of low self esteem, everything will seem like a criticism. It may explain why someone you know always shies away from you. It may explain sudden outbursts of anger with an in-law.

It's true even of sex. I love the illustration given in Sheet Music (I reviewed it a while ago). Dr. Kevin Leman says the marriage bed is the most crowded one of all. Because it's not just you and your spouse, but your parents and your spouse's parents - and those 6 individuals all see sex differently, all see marriage differently, and all have their own set of spoken and unspoken rules.

So how then do we live?

Surely only in Christ - with his eyes for one another, with the Spirit being our lens.

Surely?

If I had a green nose...

Got to love those moments when you're reading a kids story, and suddenly God speaks to you loud and clear. I'm not a Max Lucado fan, but his allegories for kids are just awesome....

Lucia and Punchinello looked out the windows of Eli's workshop. Like other Wemmicks, they were wooden people. But unlike other Wemmicks, they weren't standing in line in the village below.

"Look at them all!"exclaimed Punchinello.

"I don't understand it," Lucia wondered. "Why would anyone want to paint his nose green?"

"Because everyone else is, " Eli responded without looking up form his workbench.

Punchinello didn't understand. "What do you mean?"

"Everyone wants to look like everyone else. Sometimes it's square hats. Sometimes it's tall shoes. Why, last year the big thing was yellow ears. Now it's green noses. Everyone wants a green nose."

"Does a green nose make them smarter?"Punchinello asked

"No."

"Does a green nose make them stronger?

"No."

"Does it make them faster?

"No."

"Then what does a green nose make them?"

Eli looked up and smiled. "Greener."

But his smile left as he looked out of the window at the long line of Wemmicks. "They think they'll be happier if they look like everyone else. But I made them different on purpose. Freckles, long noses, bright eyes, dark eyes...these were my ideas. Now they all want to look the same."

and then these two Wemmicks go down to the village to get a closer look, and this is one of the conversations they have whilst observing the goings on...

"It's the latest thing," barked a Wemmick on the sidewalk. "Don't be the only Wemmick with a plain nose."

"Who is that?" asked Punchinello.

Lucia shrugged. "I don't know."

"Why, that's Mr. Willy Withit," volunteered a Wemmick from behind them.

"Does he run the nose-painting store?" asked Punchinello.

"More than that," the Wemmick explained. "Painted noses were his idea. So were the square hats and the tall shoes and the yellow ears. New things are his thing. He decides what is 'withit'. Isn't he the best?"

Lucia and Punchinello took a good look at this tall Wemmick with the deep voice, big smile, tall hat, and green bow tie that matched his oh-so-great green nose. Both were thinking the same question. Lucia asked it, "Who made him the new-thing picker?"

The Wemmick looked puzzled, like he'd never been asked that question. "Well I don't know. He always has."

Little Punchinello and some of his friends end up getting their noses painted, but they have to keep going back as green soon isn't the latest fashion, it's blue. Then yellow, orange  - you get the idea. At the end of the story they return, somewhat dejected to Eli's workshop...

"Been trying to fit in, eh?'

Punchinello nodded.

"Did you succeed?"

"Not really. Every time we got close, someone changed the rules."

"That's the way it is."

"And my neck hurt from sticking my nose in the air," Woody added.

"You weren't built to walk that way."

"We just want to be ourselves again, " Spilnt said.

"I'm glad to hear that".

"Can we?"they asked.

"Of course you can," Eli replied. "I'll always help you to be who I made you to be". Then he reached in his pocket and pulled out a piece of sandpaper. "But it's going to take some time."

And so Punchinello and his friends followed their maker into this workshop where he spent the rest of hsi day removingf the paint. It hurt to be sanded, but it was worth it be normal again.

Something's Afoot...

Ever look at things that are happening around you and realize that Someone is trying to draw your attention to something that he really wants you to pay attention to? You keep seeing references to a topic in newspapers, in books friends lend you, in conversations, in chats with your children...everywhere!

Ever noticed that in Christian circles there is a huge amount of things that are 'taboo' to talk about? Things that are unspoken because of their secrecy or connection with shame - you know the ones! Ones that you would rather choke down than bring up if your pastor and his wife came for tea. That thing that if mentioned you would like the ground to swallow you. Things that are labelled too 'sacred' to be talked about (like sex) or too intimate to be discussed (like the intricacies of marriage) or too imperfect to mention (like alcoholism)?

Well, it's time to spill the beans... I'm in both those places. I sense God is at work. I can feel His Spirit nudging me and gently leading me.

Now before you read further understand something. I have .... evolved seems like a good word to use. I used to be a very "prescriptive" Christian - there was a black, a white. There was a right way and a wrong way. There was only one kind of Christian to be and that involved a early morning 'quiet time' church every day of the week. [And again a disclaimer for those of you who may have just started reading this blog. I am NOT knocking those things. For me, and my heart, God has led me somewhere different - it is never my intention for you to feel judged or condemned by what you read here, even if we disagree...] 


Now I'm more of a "descriptive" Christian. I realize that God wants me all day of every day. That I can talk to him morning, noon and night. That 'church' means any gathering of people who believe in him, anytime, anywhere. There is a path of incredible grace that challenges me every time I think there is only one way (and no I do not believe all faiths lead to heaven!) - he's made me see that the colors black and white are not mine to use when I look at things.

And so here I am.

Longing to speak the unspoken.

Longing to break the chains of silence.

Longing to be different.

The thing God is confronting me with? Being an awesome wife. Yip. Not your average, normal wife. An awesome one. One that Braveheart will be thankful for each day. One that he cannot live without. See, Braveheart and I are facing our toughest season yet. Our marriage, which seemed so impenetrable and strong, is showing signs of wear and tear. Not bad though after 10 years and 3 kids! And why this last weekend was so incredible. A touch of heaven. A reminder that this thing, this thing called marriage, is worth a fight. God is at work in our restoration project, little by little. And it begins with me.

Marriages require work. No one told me that on my wedding day! If they were a living, breathing entity I am confident that we would take better care of them. But they are silent. And undemanding. And because of that they often become uncared for. God is highlighting this to me. All the ways that I put Braveheart second - because we are an incredible parenting team, our focus has been primarily on the kids for the last 6 years. My focus needs to and should always have him in the top spot, no matter how cheesy or old fashioned that might seem. O God change me! Of course it's easy to do with the kids, but it can no longer be the excuse. I find it exhilarating that there is such hope, and if i'm truly spilling the beans? Downright scary. Because as the proverb goes, it's hard for an old dog to learn new tricks. But dear friends, we need to learn. And here's the grace part - Lord, do this work in me. Permanent change is effortless. All of him. None of me.

See. Being honest like this just makes you wonder doesn't it? :) You're sitting there wondering how I can bear my inner thoughts to you in cyberspace. There's something here that God wants this blog to be about. A blog to serve women. A blog for women to be honest and share their souls whilst deeply loving and respecting their husbands. perhaps not this one....but one to come....? And I'm not afraid to be the first (she said pausing nervously whilst typing that line!).

Here's the thing - my struggle is that these struggles that I/we have faced are not new to anyone of us. But somehow under the guise of protecting/respecting our husbands and shrouding their egos we fail to be honest with one another. We all appear perfect. Now look here, the very last thing I am suggesting is that we call together pity parties or belittle our husbands to one another. But there is something very real about community, about love, about older women teaching younger women  -  the whole Titus 2 thing - becoming ALIVE amongst us.

And the issues that are taboo to talk about? Not quite that brave yet! But I will say this - we are supposed to be tangibly different to the world. So different that when people spend time with us they walk away CHANGED. How come the world can talk about everything and anything, and yet we, the church, fail to have an alternative? What are our answers? I know God wants me to find my voice here too - and yes, I'm scared. But if I feel imprisoned by all the things that just aren't spoken about, and God is shining his light on this, then I choose to believe this isn't only about me.

It's about the countless people he loves.

Food for thought huh?

Our Box Day

As we near the end of this year and look ahead to prepare for the new seasons in the year to come, I recognize what a privilege it is for us to be able to choose the curriculum we want King Arthur to follow. And I deeply appreciate that choice, and the circumstances that have allowed us to do that.

So it has been a week of great anticipation - we ordered Sonlight, and started tracking the movement of our order. What amazed me was a few things - first, how incredible the customer service was - literally - I had replies within 24 hours from knowledgeable people who could walk me through things step by step, and the boxes arrived before I had even finished plotting it on the map! King Arthur, Aragorn and Belle all dived into the boxes, and their joy and delight was just wonderful. 

The kids had fun with everything -
the boxes, the wrapping, the stuff!
(excuse the expressions, I think they were
singing a song whilst pretending to
be presents!)

I had this profound sense of peace, which I found so wodnerfully reassuring. Obviously with King Arthur being at a nursery school, and all his friends going into grade one, there's a lot of school talk: uniforms, new classes, teachers etc. And over the last few weeks as I've listened to this I have questioned - what is wrong with me that none of this excites me (mainstream school), non of it makes me want it for my children? So this Box Day, this great sense of peace, affirms for me that this, this path less traveled, this is the path for me to take. 

And we are all looking forward to it.

Thank you Lord. For the privilege and the opportunity.

Have you future-proofed your child?

I have had a superb day with close friends who came over for a birthday tea - about 12 ladies, many of whom had their children with them and the house just absorbed them - I am again, need I say it, supremely thankful!


This came to my inbox a few days ago on an e-loop I'm on. I found it a fascninating read - the future will truly be unlike anything we know...read on!

The times they are a changin’” never before has the title of this Bob Dylan classic been more relevant. Baby Boomers, those born between 1945 and 1964 have witnessed some truly amazing shifts in the world. They watched the dawning of the internet age, they saw the amazing star trek gadget called the personal communication device (cell phone) materialise, and computers that used to take up an entire room can now fit into the palm of their hands.

Generation X’ers (those born between 1964 and 1980) can hop on a plane as easily as a bus, play high definition games on their laptop computers against opponents on the other side of the world. They can view news as it happens instantly via satellite transmissions, and those same satellites can get us from A to B via a GPS - a tool previously reserved for the military.They are now employed in jobs that did not even exist in 1964.

According to Nikki Bush, co-author with Dr Graeme Codrington of best-selling parenting book, Future-proof Your Child, it is anticipated that our children will have had 10 – 14 jobs by the age of 38!  “It is a future we can’t even imagine and we are going to have to bring up our children to be incredibly resilient in the face of change, and who love learning, they will quite literally be learning on the job.”

Children are going to have to ramp up their creativity as innovation will be the life-blood of companies in the future.  With much more automation of jobs coming down the line, our children must be able to do that which computers can’t – utilize creativity and imagination.

Bush explains that entire new industries will become mainstream when our children reach the world of work sometime between 2020 and 2030 including robotics, artificial intelligence, biotechnology, space travel and nano-technology, to name just a few.

Commenting on the impact of the global economic recession, Bush says that if there is one thing that has been highlighted, it is that a job no longer equals security.  Companies can no longer promise you a job or an income based on your commitment and loyalty, because they can’t guarantee employment. Everything today boils down to economics.

We need a generation of children with a huge entrepreneurial mindset because many of them will be self-employed.  Understand that EMS (Economic and Management Sciences) is now a very important subject in the curriculum.  Support it as essential and not just a “soft subject”.  The global trend is to downsize head offices and to outsource or micro-source, in other words, to buy in the skills or talent required for particular projects for a limited period of time, and not necessarily to employ the person who has them.  Automation is also another trend that will replace people in the workplace.

Bush says, ‘being an entrepreneur demands a very different skill set to being employed precisely because there are no guarantees and because you are the master of your own destiny.  The message for anyone who is still employed is that everyone today is at risk, we all need to be able to reinvent or re-engineer ourselves at will, in order to remain current and employable (as an employee or an external consultant or service provider).  You need to be constantly building your brand wherever you find yourself. ‘

By encouraging your children to build their own unique brands, whether they are employed or self-employed, you will be ensuring that your children learn the lesson that they will be their own teachers.

Because we don’t know for sure exactly what jobs are coming down the line we need to future-proof our children so that they are ready for whatever life throws at them. Bush believes that children will need more than just grades to thrive in the future; they will need X-factors for success:

• Creativity,

• resilience,

• a love of learning,

• relating to others, and

• self-knowledge.

So what does this mean in financial terms? Well there is one more shocking prediction to digest, it is estimated that the chances of a child born in 2000 living to the age of 130 are 50%. This means that if we stick with old paradigms they will retire at 65 and have another 55 years to fund in retirement. So in effect we are trying to educate our children to prepare for their futures 65 years from now. This is inconceivable given the speed at which the world is changing. For the first time in history we have no clue how to prepare for the future because the future has no guidelines.

Risk products like dread disease, medical aids and disability will become even more important as job security dwindles and life expectancy increases. The only solution is to keep your finger on the pulse of change, you are back in the school room with the best of the best and you need to keep up. Those of us who just ‘let life happen’ will be in a fight for survival. 

Now more than ever we need to learn how the world of money works and instill healthy savings habits in our children. Who knows, by the time they reach retirement age (perhaps at age 110) the worlds governments may have got a whole lot smarter and will have developed an economic system that takes care of the aging population in comfort. Who knows? As it stands, we don’t, all we can do is embrace the challenge and enjoy the ride!

By Lindi Dlamini, Executive, Retail Operations for Liberty Life

Culture Chaos

This post  has been in my head for over a month, but with all that has been happening it hasn't made it to the blog. Bear with me as I try and capture what's been churning in this head of mine!

Whilst still in our old house, a new neighbor moved in next door. Now as it was a semi-detached house, we could not help but embrace whoever lived next door, and over the years we lived there we made some good friends due to the nature of being so close. However, this last family, a single mom and her three kids, altered my world view.

Have you ever noticed that there's a lot you can infer about someone by what they call their children? From names like Forgotten, or Mercy, to Love, or Happiness (seriously, these are real names from students I've taught in Zim). We've certainly chosen names for our family that reflect that we believe in God, believe he gave us our children and that show we believe them to have a destiny. The two boys in this new next door family - (I use poetic license now as I don't wish to use their real names) are called Sky and Basil, and the girl is called Indigo. 

The first tell tale sign. 

Then one evening whilst cooking dinner, it became increasingly apparent by our hacking coughs that something in the air had changed - and I realized that the fragrance of incense from the house next door was so strong that it was overpowering us. Clue number #2!

I did eventually invite the mom over for tea which was, all things considered, fairly normal, but when asked to reciprocate the visit, well let's just say I was found myself completely out of my depth.

It wasn't so much the ancient Indian poster proclaiming the 10 commandments, or the colourful interior of her home, or the ostrich plumes, or the Tibetan prayer flags.....it was the enormous sense of difference. I realized that I had not the faintest clue how to really relate to this woman, or what to talk about. She is from a sub-culture of people I have never really interacted with. I had no words for a comeback when she told me how the universe was aligning so that  her life could carry on when the father of her children left her (they never married). I was confronted, with no way of escaping, with a completely different world. 

(As a humorous aside - do you know that those of us that live in the deep south are referred to as living beyond the lentil curtain? I heard that this weekend and it cracked me up! Like the boerwors curtain of the north!)

And, if I'm honest, initially it scared me. Actually it terrified me. But after a while, those emotions grew into a deep sadness. I believe, wholeheartedly, that in his day Jesus was completely relevant to all people at all times - he hung out with the outcasts of society, he spoke love to prostitutes in broad daylight. I came to realize, that whatever I have adopted as a Christian culture, is actually so irrelevant to the world in which I live today, it is sad. It deeply troubles me. I want to have a culture, a Christian underpinning, that no matter who I talk to or converse with, they sense the FREEDOM of Christ and his love. My life felt so narrow, so sheltered, so protected. And folk...all my experiences of church, this 'holy huddle' stuff, this 'brand'of  Christianity has not prepared me to be able to really love the world as I am convinced Christ did.

We are out of our depth Christians. We've lost the plot. I don't know that we are relevant to this society in which we live anymore. And that friends is sobering. And deeply troubling.

O God.

life or death

Christianity is Life. Or Death. Depending on how you live it. How I live it. How we interpret the Bible. And how we talk to each other about the interpretations we have.

Let me give you an example. We feel for our family, that it is not right for us to be in debt, in any form. We believe it is a biblical mandate to owe no man money. Because of that core belief, we do not have accounts, we do not spend beyond our income, we even feel it is right for us not to have a mortgage, because in essence we will owe the bank money. Now I know that that concept is foreign. It goes against what the world teaches about money, saving, investing, and against pretty much what all churches teach about good stewardship. But for us, it's Life. It''s a Spirit thing. And perhaps it'll change one day, I can't say for certain. But I do know that we have complete peace in this.

We also feel free to not have health insurance in this season - and we have the grace for it (and just so you know, we have had it in the past!). By that I mean He seems to have given us such a clean bill of health. Are we foolish? Depends whose eyes you're looking at me through :) !

But if you feel condemned, or coerced into living my way, under the illusion of Christianity, then it's actually death.

Life when led by the Spirit.

Death when you follow others under the illusion of Christianity.

If you try to be me, or I try to be you, we lose the freedom he promised us.

It's only in the Spirit we can see clearly.

It's the unsettling freedom of Grace that scares us silly.

It's Greek to Me

A few days later RH and I met at a friend’s birthday lunch and then proceeded to one of the most enlightening conversations I've ever had about my faith:

“Repent! For the kingdom of heaven is near!”

How often have you heard this phrase in Christian circles, or had it preached at you? I'll wager that each time it's been spoken of it has been used with connotations of fire and brimstone, or penitence, or the more common charismatic understanding of 'turn away from and turn towards' something else. (As an aside, I am fascinated by etymology, the study of words and their origins. Interesting to note Webster's definition of the word has become the common understanding of the word today, BUT it wasn't always that way. The change happened when the Classical Greek was translated into Latin.)

The original Greek, the word 'metanoia', meant to change one's mind or heart about someone or something. So when John the baptist was out preaching in the desert and telling everyone to “Repent for the kingdom of heaven is near,” he really literally meant, 'See things a new way – look at this God again. Change your mind, change your heart – it's not as difficult to know him as it seems! It's so much easier to believe! In fact, God is all around you and right here, right now – look his kingdom is here and now!'

And so here I am. Finding my Christianity in a state of transformation. In a state of flux. Where I am examining everything I thought I knew and holding it up to the illuminating light of grace and finding myself, mouth agape, saying, “Really? It's this freeing? It's not about all these other petty things?” I'm learning to see how much my Christianity has been shaped by churches too afraid to embrace the liberty of grace, too scared of the ramifications....

It's an exhilirating, unknown journey...a journey, yet again, to the beat of a different drum.

Truly A Different Drumbeat

Sometimes along life's journey you are privileged to meet people who also walk to the beat of a different drum ... and today I want to take the opportunity to introduce you to my good friends, Mark and Laura.

You can read about their tale here, but I marvel at what they have chosen to do with their lives. They've given everything up in the UK - safety, security, to go back to the sticks (Zim slang for rural areas) and serve people. I am humbled by what they have chosen to do, especially in light of the fact that I am moving into a bigger house, whilst they have yet to find a home in which to live in the mining village. They've been offered a room in a house....picture dust and gravel, and the equivalent of a domestic quarters.

(How is that we have come to picture being blessed equals a nice place to live? Surely being blessed means something our Christian culture has missed completely...one only has to think of the beatitudes and realize how far we have fallen from the truth.)

But here's the thing - to them, it feels completely normal, and in their heart of hearts this is where they want to be. I can do birth in foreign countries, I can do financial hardship, I can do making movies, but I'm not sure I can do what they are doing.

And dear friends, that is the beauty of grace. His grace is enough for what we are all called to do. But if we are hoodwinked into thinking we all have to do what each other is doing, then we lose sight of the bigger picture, of the freedom that Christ has called us to. Let's just stop looking at each other, keep our eyes on him  and let Him do the work - let him lead us and guide us. And let us be willing - to reach out and support those who are doing something completely out of our comfort zone.

Their journey has also made me question education and teaching AGAIN! Education, in the third world, can be such a stepping stone for people out of poverty, and I think I easily forget that. These children's parents are desperate for them to have a better future than they themselves have had - they want them to have opportunities they never did. How else are these children going to receive that unless through school?

Food for thought huh?

Lens of Truth

I read this post over at Generation Cedar, and I note Kelly Crawford has actually changed the purpose of her blog now - she now writes to equip families with truth. Her blog has completely challenged me in the past, although I don't read her very often anymore, her blog has challenged and altered my world views on a number of occasions.

I've copied her post here, as it's just really thought provoking - her entire site is:

“My mom gave me $40 on my new pair of jeans, but she still thinks they’re too expensive.”

Fourteen-year-old “Amy” told my daughter.

“They cost $150 but everybody has a pair and I’ve been wanting some for so long.  I (interject squeal) loooooove them!”

My bugged eyes matched my open mouth as I listened to the conversation.
This is what we call “the real world”?  This is *not* “the real world”.  This is one we are fabricating.  A world that is being perpetuated through childhood and on into adulthood.  A world where adults are slaves to debt because they *must* have what everyone else has, no matter the cost.  A world where one’s identity is wrapped up in the name on his label.
Another overheard conversation involved the recent break-up of a young girlfriend and boyfriend.  In the prime of their youth, when life offers so many opportunities for growth and preparation, they are distracted, consumed and wounded with premature romance.
Preparing for the real world? What, a world where a boy has practiced leaving the one he “loves” when he gets tired of her?  A world where a girl is always looking for a “better relationship”?  Do those habits just give way to fidelity once the vows are made?
No.  And you can confirm that with about 60% of the population.  This is our reality.  This is the world we’ve created.
If you say “I want my children to be prepared for the real world”,  you had better define which world that is.  Because this world is not a world where the principles of God reign.  It is not a world where wisdom is exalted.  It is not a world where children are grown into responsible, productive adults who love Heaven more than earth.
I watch a family frantically shuffling their schedule to figure out when they might eat supper.  “I’ll pick up Tyler at 4, but you’ll have to take Katy to her soccer practice and I won’t make it because Tyler’s team has pictures afterwards.  Oh, and don’t forget Katy’s game is tomorrow night.  We’ll just pick up a burger.”
Is this the real world?  Every ounce of time, money and energy poured into a recreation that will most likely be a distant memory in a few years? Preparing them for the real world?  A world where the family table is only a place to hold the clutter of going and coming people?  A world where people are so busy they don’t notice how little they know about each other until it’s too late?  A world where our children learn where our hearts are because of where we spend our treasure?
Yes, I’m afraid that is exactly the world we’ve created.
Welcome to the “new real world”.


Just plain food for thought huh?

Heart Gripping

This boy, Damian McGinty, was 14 (can you believe it?) when he performed this song in a show called Celtic Thunder. When Braveheart saw this, he said "A good song cripples me", and it literally rendered the rest of his day somewhat unproductive. He has played it over and over (along with some other Celtic Thunder songs) - so that the boys can now sing it (and others!) word for word.

This song undid me in other ways. It reduced me to tears because of the desire it unleashed within me and the thoughts it provoked. I desire, with all my heart, for my children to be really good at something. I don't want them to have mediocre lives, and I want them to soar.

I believe we have all been given gifts, and talents, many of which go unnoticed.  Am I paying my kids enough attention to realize when they are gifted? To realize what their strengths are? Do I trust God to show me?

I want to fan into flame the giftings God has given my children.

Lord show us how.

Home Hopping

After a relatively calm morning catching up with an old friend and doing my weekly grocery shop, the day snowballed...and I am pleased to report we are moving! Braveheart gave notice this morning, and we found someone to take our place before the lease is up, and it's all A for Away! Yip, that's what that cryptic reference was a few posts ago.

A lady phoned us out of the blue and asked if we'd like to rent her house, which is literally just down the road. It is lovely, well actually, it's steadily grown on me. It has a maze of rooms compared to where we presently are, and in my eyes is perfect for me and homeschooling next year. As some of you know, I've been desiring this space for a long, long time. And it's funny, because it made me see how well rooted I am here, in this home, in spite of all the things I don't like about it. It takes guts, and some courage to allow ourselves to follow the adventure of this move, I guess it's that different drumbeat we hear so clearly in our lives.

It's a step of faith....it's going to change our daily living in a huge way, but we'll have to curtail our living in other ways. The move will take at the end of September, right in school holidays - groan! i'm going to try and pack beforehand so I get to at least have a holiday with my kids.

So I will loose my recently planted veggie patch, which I will have you know is the first thing I have ever grown successfully! At least the new tenants will have a healthy welcoming!

The Dragon (Lady)

... needs to be slain. Over the last few days it really feels like I've turned into a dragon towards my kids by the end of the day. Somedays, I swear that by the time Braveheart gets home I'm almost breathing fire, and smoke is coming out of my ears!

The heart of it? My inability to keep my emotions in check when confronted with whining/tell tales/ childish reasoning and emotions. (Sometimes my emotions seem like the childish ones! They're children after all....I'm the adult!). And so I snarl. And hiss. And snap.

I'm recognizing more and more that it's not so much the words that we speak but the way in which we speak them that matter....and too often I forget that in the thick of things. Braveheart has the most amazing nack of seemingly always speaking with grace and love, and perhaps because he isn't at home all day he has a better ability to sustain it until the kids go to sleep. Even when he is correcting and reprimanding, he does it so that they know they are loved no matter what's going on at that moment. He constantly teaches me. ( I can often be heard asking – well what would you have said? And there's no answer there. It's a heart issue.

But there's a danger there too. A danger of him becoming the nurturer not me. Because when I lose it, or when I get angry, I withdraw - it's what was modelled to me growing up.

I was reminded today whilst skimming through my teenage diaries (so feel like spring cleaning!) how important it is to set up a home where children always feel safe, where they truly believe from an early age that you're there for them. You're on their side NO MATTER WHAT. And that starts NOW. It's too late if we wait till they're teenagers.

I need to slay this dragon. Or rather, I need Christ to arrive on a silver white horse of love and pierce my heart.

Oh boy!

Waiting for Superman

I am passionate about education and learning, and if you are at all interested in either of those things, grab a tissue and watch this. I am so thankful I live in Africa sometimes, and that I had a Zimbabwean education!

Another take...

I stumbled across this man today, and love what he has to say. Sir Ken Robinson is a man after my own heart, and although he is not a supporter of homeschooling per se, his views on education encouraged and excited me. Here is a man blazing the trail when it comes down to creativity and education. This is what we have lost, this is what our schools today are lacking, this is why we are choosing to homeschool our children.

Current systems of education are based on the manufacturing principles of linearity, conformity and standardization. The evidence is everywhere that they are failing too many students and teachers alike. A primary reason is that human development is not linear and standardized, it is organic and diverse. People, as opposed to products, have hopes and aspirations, feelings and purposes. Education is a personal process. What and how young people are taught have to engage their energies, imaginations and their different ways of learning.

In this talk, I make a passing reference to fast food. Let me elaborate briefly. In the catering business, there are two main methods of quality assurance. The first is standardizing. If you have a favorite fast food brand, you can go to any outlet anywhere and know exactly what you will find: same burger, fries, cola, décor, and attitudes. Everything is standardized and guaranteed. By the way, this “cheap” food is also contributing to the most costly epidemic of diabetes and obesity in human history. But at least the standards are guaranteed.

The other method of quality assurance are the star ratings guides, like Michelin. These methods do not prescribe what’s on the menu, when restaurants should open, or how they should be decorated. They set out criteria of excellence and it’s up to each restaurant to meet them in their own way. They can be French, Mexican, Italian, Indian, American or anything else. They can open when they choose, serve what they like and hire whom they want. In general they are much better than fast food and offer a higher standard of service. The reason is that they are customized to local markets and personalized to the people they serve.

Musings On Mt. Sinai

I realize, every now and then, how similar I am to those good old Israelites wandering around in the desert, perpetually coming back to Mt. Sinai. Ever noticed how often you come face to face with the same issues in life? In the last few weeks I have been noticing God show me this is my life, and in the lies around me. It seems that we seldom, if ever, move into the promised land. What is it that keeps us so trapped? And how do we disentangle ourselves from what holds us back to leap into what we truly believe?