Fear...

Over the last few days I have been so conscious of being crippled and paralyzed by fear....

Fear does that to all of us.

It inhibits us from being ALL that we were called to be.

It strips us of our true identity...

And leaves us quaking in the wings of life.

I know this, because I'm living it.

And so I asked God - what is it about this Fear? From where does it stem?

And for me, the fear that leaves me breathless, strangled for air and all panicky, comes from comparing my self to others. All my fear comes from looking at who others are, what they do, how they live...and then feeling that I don't have it all/do it all etc.

There's a reason God originally gave a command imploring us not to covet...not to look at what our neigbour has and want tit too, (and I take the liberty for that to mean more than just material things).

And this fear prevents me from hearing the truth my friends are speaking, and in part I recognize them bringing me words straight from the throne. Truth that offers me life and hope. Friends, if there's one thing we do as parents, let it be that we train our children even now, to be able to hear and listen to the truth, and put away this fear. Learning it at 30+ is just hard work!

And the other things I fear? The completely irrational daydreams I have that involve things like "What if's" etc...that unfounded fear is a result of letting my thoughts wander around unchecked.

So the answer? I'm not entirely sure. But I am greatly encouraged by this:

⁷For God did not give us a spirit of timidity (of cowardice, of craven and cringing and fawning fear), but [He has given us a spirit] of power and of love and of calm and well-balanced mind and discipline and self-control. (2Ti 1:17, Amplified)

Food for thought huh?

Being Kneaded

My heart has stilled over the last few days.

And I have been tenderly kneaded by my Maker.

I have been made to pause, to see things anew, afresh.

And my heart has leapt. This feeling of him kneading me, molding and shaping and changing me..

....sends tingles down my spine.

It makes me sprout tears. And gut wrenching sobs.

It challenges me to be all that I can be. All that he's made me to be. Simply by letting him do the work.

He has stopped me. Held me. Lovingly shown me that there is actually a different way of living. A life of grace so much deeper than anything I am used to.

A life that measures my children as immeasurable gifts.
A life where joy is important, and sadly too far forgotten in my life.
A life where delight carries weight.
A life where hurry plays no part.

My heart has found its way to a quiet oasis.

And I am inspired.

My Comfortable Cocoon

I've just got out of a relaxing bath into which I collapsed after a seemingly endless day. I woke up at 0430 this morning, (might I add by choice? go figure!), to attend a 0515 spinning class with an instructor I really enjoy. However, the cost today is making me seriously question my sanity in choosing to do something like that! And he didn't even play good music - so picture me with head thumping music as the sun was coming up - not my cup of tea! I have struggled to stay awake throughout the day, wanting to choose self over motherhood often. The boys were very understanding when I attempted to grab some rest midday, but Belle is still a little young to understand that mom's closed door means "leave me alone", not "yell even louder"! So, methinks I shall relook at my training schedule and make something else work!

But whilst in the bath, I was reflecting on what God appears to be drawing my attention to, yet again. I feel like he is peeling off layers and layers of misconceptions about deeply entrenched ideas that aren't full of Light. And I realize that this is something he loves to do - to set us free. I realize because of His nature there is always a hope, a redemption available for me in the end that promises to be far more beautiful than where I am presently at, but by george (whoever he may be!) it is uncomfortable. So even though I am not enjoying this, I look forward to the end....

Yearnings for the Year

So...the new year has begun, and is well on its way. And today is the first time in weeks that I am stopping. Just grinding to a halt. We've been so busy the last few weeks, out every day, doing little things - whether it be people, outings or errands. And with Braveheart going back to work, it's an opportunity just to STOP. And BE. And so we are.

As I write this the kids are eating sweets - yes, it's true. At this point I am keen to get the Christmas sweets over and done with! I love the peace and the calm that is emanating from my home today (somewhat intermittently I might add, there are still the odd squabbles, but I mean overall!). I love having my kids around me, and having time to be and speak into their lives without having to 'do' anything. I have to make a conscious effort not to create things for them to do today - it does not come naturally to me...

2011. Another year. Another start.

Me? These are some of my yearnings for the year: (Some semantics - I dislike "resolutions"...that implies something I have to work at to change..."yearnings", well that implies a desire, a longing, something God and I can do together - in his time, with his prompting....)

I long to sort out my food dilemma. I'll digress to bring you up to speed. I have come to loathe food - not when it is served to me, or made by someone else, but when I have to prepare it - cook it, make it..anything with food that requires my involvement leaves me sighing deeply. If I'm really honest, I think it comes down to pure laziness (oh the effort) and selfishness (I love being served, but not necessarily serving). And here's the rub - an a mother, and a wife, those really are two qualities that are not synonymous with those callings. If I want to have a home that is warm and  happy something has to give!

So to this end I have made a few adjustments again. I have created a breakfast, lunch and diner plan. This has streamlined  my shopping, and helps me mentally get a handle on what is required.  And as I do the shopping and the meal planning I am the only one really responsible for what my family eats - and I long to incorporate more of what I believe constitutes healthy eating, and to eat the way I want to - which largely falls by the wayside as to cook two meals etc just isn't cutting it for me. I also loathe budgeting and making money stretch....something I need to master. Any tips anyone? :)

But here's the thing. We've talked about it as a family, and I'm impressed with my kids - they're on board. I've cut out sugar cereals (thanks for the idea Nikki)  except for one day a week, and they have to eat some things they don't like. And when I sit down with a bowl of fruit, or some salad, they inevitably want what I am eating. Kids will follow our example, pure and simple - so the question is, what kinds of example are we setting them?      

I yearn for family time. Now we spend a lot of time as a family, but I still yearn for more. It's a priority for me.  More memories. A deeper sense of family, and what it means to be parents and be speaking into our lives. And to this end, again, it falls on me - it's my bent. I have blocked out the year, looked at all the public holidays and have an idea of when we'd like to try and get away again as a family. Now I need to find affordable options. I even feel that my time cycling is drawing to a close - as the Argus draws closer, it's going to require 3-4 solid rides of training a week, each 3-5 hours, and that's just such a huge chunk of time over the next two months. Time I'm not really that willing to hand over any more. I'm curious as to what will replace it though...interesting huh?

I long to see my children thrive in their new seasons this year. King Arthur will be at home with me, Aragorn for the first time will start a school on his own, not under King Arthur's shadow, and I really sense he will become his own person. And Belle also starts a little school. Now whilst I want them all home with me, I also know that this is right for each of them. Aragorn caves in to King Arthur too often. I sense God will use this to build him into his own confident self. And Belle will be able to be whoever she really is! And King Arthur will soak up this one on one time. This is also a new season for me - homeschooling. The teacher in me has unpacked all the stuff, put it on the shelves, filed it...and I have the same butterflies in my stomach I had when I taught for the first time! I'm determined to embrace this in a relaxed way - watch this space!

And being a wife. This kind of dove tails into the others. I want to focus more than anything on being the wife I've always wanted to be. A wife that sometimes makes her husband's favorite meal for dinner instead of always making the kids favorite ones, or feeding him the quickest easiest meal (like scrambled eggs!). I want to pack his lunch with as much effort as I do the kids - thinking about the nature of his day and whether it involves touch rugby, or gym etc. I want to think of creative ways to spend time with him, with and without the kids, not always putting the kids first.....all these things, that seemed so natural pre-kids, so natural when we were dating...are so foreign to me now.

I have some steep learning curves ahead of me!

 

Dregs of 2010

Don't you just love waking up on a Cape Town morning to stillness?

Especially after the constant blustery gale?

This morning, at our house was one of those mornings. And it was pure bliss!

The last few days of this year have been good. We went walking in Newlands forest (p.s. a wind free zone! Magic!!!! I'm going to go back soon!) with a friend from Zimbabwe...

a somewhat empty stream

...which  the boys had to climb through

pretty huh?

The reason we went to the forest was to build forts -
sadly Newlands doesn't lend itself to forts as well as Cecilia forest,
but Braveheart and the boys made a grand attempt!

Today, we went to Cecilia forest with family, and walked along the path through the forest and into Kirstenbosch. A lovely manageable stroll, with a delicious picnic at the end....

The time it took was greatly extended by discovering that this stream that we crossed
had tadpoles in it, which the boys just HAD to try and catch! They caught
four, I was quite impressed!

Belle and her cousin

I realise I take loads of photos of Belle - but I also think
it's because she just sits still! The boys
can't stop long enough for me to take good ones!

the cousins

the boys cooling off 

So it's the last day of the year. I'm am not a fan of New Year's resolutions, but I do love the start of a New year, and the opportunity it gives to start things afresh, to change, to move on.

And although I did New Year's Eve parties in a big way when I was growing up (as my parents hosted endless numbers of them, and still do to this day and they're over 55!), in my parenting years they hold very little attraction for me. I think it's the combination of a great night - but a late night, and then an early morning with the kids!

This year, I really wanted to spend it with the kids, and also had hoped to hike somewhere for the sunset. But given that we'd already worn them out on a hike this morning, I opted instead to picnic on the beach at sunset. Aha! little did I know the South Easter would pick up, yet again!

Undeterred, we went to Noordhoek beach, where the sand was stinging our legs and blinding us, and climbed high into the sand dunes and sat in the shelter the Milkwood trees offered us. It was really lovely....

Aragorn...

Our view

We drew a line in the sand, said good-bye to 2010 whilst facing the land (suburbia), and then turned around, jumped over the line and yelled hello to 2011, looking at the ocean. I found it symbolic. (God had laid it on my heart earlier today - and I find those sorts of things sometimes downright odd (doing something physical that God has asked you to)). But this afternoon, looking at that expansive horizon, I realized that's what 2011 looks like for all of us.

A blank horizon. Empty. Barren. Open.

A year of opportunity.

Of Possibility.

Of hope.

As we continue to walk down this road together, may our year ahead be one that changes us all,

 forever.

If I had a green nose...

Got to love those moments when you're reading a kids story, and suddenly God speaks to you loud and clear. I'm not a Max Lucado fan, but his allegories for kids are just awesome....

Lucia and Punchinello looked out the windows of Eli's workshop. Like other Wemmicks, they were wooden people. But unlike other Wemmicks, they weren't standing in line in the village below.

"Look at them all!"exclaimed Punchinello.

"I don't understand it," Lucia wondered. "Why would anyone want to paint his nose green?"

"Because everyone else is, " Eli responded without looking up form his workbench.

Punchinello didn't understand. "What do you mean?"

"Everyone wants to look like everyone else. Sometimes it's square hats. Sometimes it's tall shoes. Why, last year the big thing was yellow ears. Now it's green noses. Everyone wants a green nose."

"Does a green nose make them smarter?"Punchinello asked

"No."

"Does a green nose make them stronger?

"No."

"Does it make them faster?

"No."

"Then what does a green nose make them?"

Eli looked up and smiled. "Greener."

But his smile left as he looked out of the window at the long line of Wemmicks. "They think they'll be happier if they look like everyone else. But I made them different on purpose. Freckles, long noses, bright eyes, dark eyes...these were my ideas. Now they all want to look the same."

and then these two Wemmicks go down to the village to get a closer look, and this is one of the conversations they have whilst observing the goings on...

"It's the latest thing," barked a Wemmick on the sidewalk. "Don't be the only Wemmick with a plain nose."

"Who is that?" asked Punchinello.

Lucia shrugged. "I don't know."

"Why, that's Mr. Willy Withit," volunteered a Wemmick from behind them.

"Does he run the nose-painting store?" asked Punchinello.

"More than that," the Wemmick explained. "Painted noses were his idea. So were the square hats and the tall shoes and the yellow ears. New things are his thing. He decides what is 'withit'. Isn't he the best?"

Lucia and Punchinello took a good look at this tall Wemmick with the deep voice, big smile, tall hat, and green bow tie that matched his oh-so-great green nose. Both were thinking the same question. Lucia asked it, "Who made him the new-thing picker?"

The Wemmick looked puzzled, like he'd never been asked that question. "Well I don't know. He always has."

Little Punchinello and some of his friends end up getting their noses painted, but they have to keep going back as green soon isn't the latest fashion, it's blue. Then yellow, orange  - you get the idea. At the end of the story they return, somewhat dejected to Eli's workshop...

"Been trying to fit in, eh?'

Punchinello nodded.

"Did you succeed?"

"Not really. Every time we got close, someone changed the rules."

"That's the way it is."

"And my neck hurt from sticking my nose in the air," Woody added.

"You weren't built to walk that way."

"We just want to be ourselves again, " Spilnt said.

"I'm glad to hear that".

"Can we?"they asked.

"Of course you can," Eli replied. "I'll always help you to be who I made you to be". Then he reached in his pocket and pulled out a piece of sandpaper. "But it's going to take some time."

And so Punchinello and his friends followed their maker into this workshop where he spent the rest of hsi day removingf the paint. It hurt to be sanded, but it was worth it be normal again.

Something's Afoot...

Ever look at things that are happening around you and realize that Someone is trying to draw your attention to something that he really wants you to pay attention to? You keep seeing references to a topic in newspapers, in books friends lend you, in conversations, in chats with your children...everywhere!

Ever noticed that in Christian circles there is a huge amount of things that are 'taboo' to talk about? Things that are unspoken because of their secrecy or connection with shame - you know the ones! Ones that you would rather choke down than bring up if your pastor and his wife came for tea. That thing that if mentioned you would like the ground to swallow you. Things that are labelled too 'sacred' to be talked about (like sex) or too intimate to be discussed (like the intricacies of marriage) or too imperfect to mention (like alcoholism)?

Well, it's time to spill the beans... I'm in both those places. I sense God is at work. I can feel His Spirit nudging me and gently leading me.

Now before you read further understand something. I have .... evolved seems like a good word to use. I used to be a very "prescriptive" Christian - there was a black, a white. There was a right way and a wrong way. There was only one kind of Christian to be and that involved a early morning 'quiet time' church every day of the week. [And again a disclaimer for those of you who may have just started reading this blog. I am NOT knocking those things. For me, and my heart, God has led me somewhere different - it is never my intention for you to feel judged or condemned by what you read here, even if we disagree...] 


Now I'm more of a "descriptive" Christian. I realize that God wants me all day of every day. That I can talk to him morning, noon and night. That 'church' means any gathering of people who believe in him, anytime, anywhere. There is a path of incredible grace that challenges me every time I think there is only one way (and no I do not believe all faiths lead to heaven!) - he's made me see that the colors black and white are not mine to use when I look at things.

And so here I am.

Longing to speak the unspoken.

Longing to break the chains of silence.

Longing to be different.

The thing God is confronting me with? Being an awesome wife. Yip. Not your average, normal wife. An awesome one. One that Braveheart will be thankful for each day. One that he cannot live without. See, Braveheart and I are facing our toughest season yet. Our marriage, which seemed so impenetrable and strong, is showing signs of wear and tear. Not bad though after 10 years and 3 kids! And why this last weekend was so incredible. A touch of heaven. A reminder that this thing, this thing called marriage, is worth a fight. God is at work in our restoration project, little by little. And it begins with me.

Marriages require work. No one told me that on my wedding day! If they were a living, breathing entity I am confident that we would take better care of them. But they are silent. And undemanding. And because of that they often become uncared for. God is highlighting this to me. All the ways that I put Braveheart second - because we are an incredible parenting team, our focus has been primarily on the kids for the last 6 years. My focus needs to and should always have him in the top spot, no matter how cheesy or old fashioned that might seem. O God change me! Of course it's easy to do with the kids, but it can no longer be the excuse. I find it exhilarating that there is such hope, and if i'm truly spilling the beans? Downright scary. Because as the proverb goes, it's hard for an old dog to learn new tricks. But dear friends, we need to learn. And here's the grace part - Lord, do this work in me. Permanent change is effortless. All of him. None of me.

See. Being honest like this just makes you wonder doesn't it? :) You're sitting there wondering how I can bear my inner thoughts to you in cyberspace. There's something here that God wants this blog to be about. A blog to serve women. A blog for women to be honest and share their souls whilst deeply loving and respecting their husbands. perhaps not this one....but one to come....? And I'm not afraid to be the first (she said pausing nervously whilst typing that line!).

Here's the thing - my struggle is that these struggles that I/we have faced are not new to anyone of us. But somehow under the guise of protecting/respecting our husbands and shrouding their egos we fail to be honest with one another. We all appear perfect. Now look here, the very last thing I am suggesting is that we call together pity parties or belittle our husbands to one another. But there is something very real about community, about love, about older women teaching younger women  -  the whole Titus 2 thing - becoming ALIVE amongst us.

And the issues that are taboo to talk about? Not quite that brave yet! But I will say this - we are supposed to be tangibly different to the world. So different that when people spend time with us they walk away CHANGED. How come the world can talk about everything and anything, and yet we, the church, fail to have an alternative? What are our answers? I know God wants me to find my voice here too - and yes, I'm scared. But if I feel imprisoned by all the things that just aren't spoken about, and God is shining his light on this, then I choose to believe this isn't only about me.

It's about the countless people he loves.

Food for thought huh?

Aragorn's Meal Of Blessing

I guess this idea came from my love of Jewish culture and tradition - I find it so rich with meaning, purpose and symbolism, something so missing in my own culture. With both my boys there has come a point where it feels they need to be released into something more, to be affirmed - and usually I have found this to be indicated by an outward display of shocking behavior that echoes an inner cry - one that says "Do you see me? Do you notice me? Am I important to you?" And our reply is  "YES! Let us show you how important you are to us."

 And so this is what has been established: we create a special meal, a meal that the child chooses. And I ask a dear graphic designer friend to put on paper all the things I feel in my spirit for the specific child. Then we sit around the table, eat, and speak those blessings over the child. King Arthur had one when he was about three and a half - and I'm sure there will be more!

It is our privilege as parents to speak blessings of identity and direction over our children - it is our duty, it is our job. It is up to us to bless them into their lives. I believe this with all my heart, and am passionate about ensuring it for my children:

Jonathan's face at coming to the table and seeing it laid and
made to look special

Aragorn chose yorkshire puddings and sausages!

he loves candles and thankfully i had some in the drawer
so whipped them out!

reading the blessing over him - and he spontaneously went around
the table hugging everyone!

this smile of pure delight made it so worth it -
i could swear he looked taller by the end of the blessing!

rainbow jelly for pudding!

 It pays to listen to the promptings we feel - I've been wanting to do this for over 6 months!

Culture Chaos

This post  has been in my head for over a month, but with all that has been happening it hasn't made it to the blog. Bear with me as I try and capture what's been churning in this head of mine!

Whilst still in our old house, a new neighbor moved in next door. Now as it was a semi-detached house, we could not help but embrace whoever lived next door, and over the years we lived there we made some good friends due to the nature of being so close. However, this last family, a single mom and her three kids, altered my world view.

Have you ever noticed that there's a lot you can infer about someone by what they call their children? From names like Forgotten, or Mercy, to Love, or Happiness (seriously, these are real names from students I've taught in Zim). We've certainly chosen names for our family that reflect that we believe in God, believe he gave us our children and that show we believe them to have a destiny. The two boys in this new next door family - (I use poetic license now as I don't wish to use their real names) are called Sky and Basil, and the girl is called Indigo. 

The first tell tale sign. 

Then one evening whilst cooking dinner, it became increasingly apparent by our hacking coughs that something in the air had changed - and I realized that the fragrance of incense from the house next door was so strong that it was overpowering us. Clue number #2!

I did eventually invite the mom over for tea which was, all things considered, fairly normal, but when asked to reciprocate the visit, well let's just say I was found myself completely out of my depth.

It wasn't so much the ancient Indian poster proclaiming the 10 commandments, or the colourful interior of her home, or the ostrich plumes, or the Tibetan prayer flags.....it was the enormous sense of difference. I realized that I had not the faintest clue how to really relate to this woman, or what to talk about. She is from a sub-culture of people I have never really interacted with. I had no words for a comeback when she told me how the universe was aligning so that  her life could carry on when the father of her children left her (they never married). I was confronted, with no way of escaping, with a completely different world. 

(As a humorous aside - do you know that those of us that live in the deep south are referred to as living beyond the lentil curtain? I heard that this weekend and it cracked me up! Like the boerwors curtain of the north!)

And, if I'm honest, initially it scared me. Actually it terrified me. But after a while, those emotions grew into a deep sadness. I believe, wholeheartedly, that in his day Jesus was completely relevant to all people at all times - he hung out with the outcasts of society, he spoke love to prostitutes in broad daylight. I came to realize, that whatever I have adopted as a Christian culture, is actually so irrelevant to the world in which I live today, it is sad. It deeply troubles me. I want to have a culture, a Christian underpinning, that no matter who I talk to or converse with, they sense the FREEDOM of Christ and his love. My life felt so narrow, so sheltered, so protected. And folk...all my experiences of church, this 'holy huddle' stuff, this 'brand'of  Christianity has not prepared me to be able to really love the world as I am convinced Christ did.

We are out of our depth Christians. We've lost the plot. I don't know that we are relevant to this society in which we live anymore. And that friends is sobering. And deeply troubling.

O God.

life or death

Christianity is Life. Or Death. Depending on how you live it. How I live it. How we interpret the Bible. And how we talk to each other about the interpretations we have.

Let me give you an example. We feel for our family, that it is not right for us to be in debt, in any form. We believe it is a biblical mandate to owe no man money. Because of that core belief, we do not have accounts, we do not spend beyond our income, we even feel it is right for us not to have a mortgage, because in essence we will owe the bank money. Now I know that that concept is foreign. It goes against what the world teaches about money, saving, investing, and against pretty much what all churches teach about good stewardship. But for us, it's Life. It''s a Spirit thing. And perhaps it'll change one day, I can't say for certain. But I do know that we have complete peace in this.

We also feel free to not have health insurance in this season - and we have the grace for it (and just so you know, we have had it in the past!). By that I mean He seems to have given us such a clean bill of health. Are we foolish? Depends whose eyes you're looking at me through :) !

But if you feel condemned, or coerced into living my way, under the illusion of Christianity, then it's actually death.

Life when led by the Spirit.

Death when you follow others under the illusion of Christianity.

If you try to be me, or I try to be you, we lose the freedom he promised us.

It's only in the Spirit we can see clearly.

It's the unsettling freedom of Grace that scares us silly.

It's Greek to Me

A few days later RH and I met at a friend’s birthday lunch and then proceeded to one of the most enlightening conversations I've ever had about my faith:

“Repent! For the kingdom of heaven is near!”

How often have you heard this phrase in Christian circles, or had it preached at you? I'll wager that each time it's been spoken of it has been used with connotations of fire and brimstone, or penitence, or the more common charismatic understanding of 'turn away from and turn towards' something else. (As an aside, I am fascinated by etymology, the study of words and their origins. Interesting to note Webster's definition of the word has become the common understanding of the word today, BUT it wasn't always that way. The change happened when the Classical Greek was translated into Latin.)

The original Greek, the word 'metanoia', meant to change one's mind or heart about someone or something. So when John the baptist was out preaching in the desert and telling everyone to “Repent for the kingdom of heaven is near,” he really literally meant, 'See things a new way – look at this God again. Change your mind, change your heart – it's not as difficult to know him as it seems! It's so much easier to believe! In fact, God is all around you and right here, right now – look his kingdom is here and now!'

And so here I am. Finding my Christianity in a state of transformation. In a state of flux. Where I am examining everything I thought I knew and holding it up to the illuminating light of grace and finding myself, mouth agape, saying, “Really? It's this freeing? It's not about all these other petty things?” I'm learning to see how much my Christianity has been shaped by churches too afraid to embrace the liberty of grace, too scared of the ramifications....

It's an exhilirating, unknown journey...a journey, yet again, to the beat of a different drum.

Legalism and Grace

A dear friend of mine, RH, is one of the few men whose walk in Christ is inspirational and noteworthy. A while ago he sent out this email, which really struck a chord within me. After reading it, I felt so convicted about how little I understood about Christ, and how little I really knew the freedom of his grace. Here's the beginning, and some of the ones that resonated with me. (You can join Grace Rising and receive his posts here)

The comedian, Jeff Foxworthy, has gained worldwide fame for his "...you might be a redneck" jokes. Here is a take-off on his routine, referring instead to "...you might be a legalist."

These are the some of the ones I ticked off – (and some of them I'm just still thinking about....musing over them, thinking things like – there's another way to think about this? Really? Go ahead, read the list and see. What resonates with you?)

• If you think that God's Law can effect right living...then you might be a legalist.
• If you think that a man can keep God's principles and precepts...then you might be a legalist.
• If you think that there is a right answer and right action for every circumstance (if you could just take the time to figure it out)...then you might be a legalist.
• If you think that obedience is doing what the rules indicate...then you might be a legalist.
• If you feel frustrated and defeated in that you just don't seem to be able to do it all right and perfect...then you might be a legalist.
• If you are burdened by self-condemnation for your failures in life...then you might be a legalist.
• If you think the 10 commandments are still authoritative for Christians today...then you might be a legalist.
• If you think that abstinence is a virtue...then you might be a legalist.
• If you think that tithing is the standard for Christian giving...then you might be a legalist.
• If you've ever felt guilty for driving up in a new car, or buying a new dress, or even a new home...then you might be a legalist.
• If you've ever tried to impose your perspective of modesty on another...then you might be a legalist.
• If you men have ever felt condemned for having taken a second look at a beautiful woman (in a short skirt)...then you might be a legalist.
• If you think that Christians shouldn't practice birth control...then you might be a legalist.
• If you've ever taken off jewelry or wiped off make-up to capitulate to another's religious scruples...then you might be a legalist
• If you've ever looked down upon another for their living arrangements...then you might be a legalist.

Adventures in Time...

Some friends of mine are planning a great adventure in 2012 – they're going to sail across the Atlantic as a family and make their way to the Caribbean. To say I am envious is an understatement! The more I was dwelling on this and how much I wanted their adventure to be mine, God stopped me dead in my tracks and spoke to me.

See, I've always believed that our lives are part of some large story (an epic tale if you will), that we all have a role to play and that when we do live out our lives the way we were created to, we bring glory to God and He delights in us. (echoes of Eldredge anyone?)

The things is, people probably look into my life and wish they were living my adventure – because what I am involved with is an adventure (and this was the great dawning realization!). Braveheart works with a dynamic team of people to create a kids animated TV series, Jungle Beat. This awesome and talented group of people are also birthing a brand from this TV series, and launching a mascot for SARU. Already, and we're only 5 years in, we have clothing and accessories and we are infiltrating the market in an unprecedented way for a local product. The road has not been easy, and we are not yet even at a pit stop!

But their vision doesn't just stop there. Their heart is to create wholesome media content for the world. Content that encourages and exhorts, that calls out the very best in us and leads us to be all we were created to be ... for stories to be so captivating, so solid and life changing, that people are drawn to God – because of the sheer brilliance of them. The greatest teacher of all taught so often using stories....

And so this is my adventure. This is bigger than me. It might be my husbands road … but there us a part for me in this as well. There are times we wonder if it will be our children that carry on the legacy, if our lives are just the years of plowing. Who are we to question eternity? Instead of looking at the lives other people get to live, I was just so reminded to look at this life He has chosen for me to live, and TO LIVE IT... with power and passion and energy....

What adventure are you living?