Belle had a febrile convulsion a few nights ago - that's a seizure caused by a rapid spike in temperature. It caused me to panic quite frankly (King Arthur had some a few years ago), and as neither my husband nor I could bring her round, we rushed her to our nearest hospital. Thankfully, she regained consciousness and quickly bounced back her her usual cheerful precious self after a few hours.
Whilst it was happening I was fascinated with my reaction - I want to immediately get her to a medical facility as I thought it would be safer...and yet when I got there I was reminded that they too are human and that only God sustains life. And I'm finding that quite a vulnerable position to be in...because he keeps reminding me of it every time my children are unwell. He, alone, is the maker and taker of life.
And I was struck by what an incredibly sheltered and privileged life I happen to lead. I was astonished at the hospital staff's apparent lack of interest or concern in my daughter's predicament - but after being there a while I understood. They are used to far worse scenarios - whilst waiting a little baby was brought in who had fallen into a pot of cooking oil; at another time men were brought in with stab wounds. Incredible what happens when your perspective changes, when you grasp understanding, how it can change your outlook, your grace for others, how it helps you to put yourself in someone else's shoes.
Yes, very scary. This *fragility of faith* hit me very hard when I had my first baby and it continues to challenge me in times like these you speak of.
ReplyDeleteVery glad Belle is well again.
Mel